People hate canned speeches. They think they are inauthentic and only used by slimy salespeople. But, try if you would to practice what a great mentor of mine always said: “Get out of judgment and into curiosity.” I say that because I’m going to tell you here and now that I love canned speeches. I find them very economical in the sense of conveying an important message succinctly and consistently. Over my years of selling real estate, I have found myself reiterating the same message to homebuyers and home sellers enough times that they seem like canned speeches by now. But if you’ve ever made a great soup or a batch of preserves that your family loved, you’d certainly want to make them the same way again. You might even can them. So let me share a few of my canned speeches and see what you think.
To Homebuyers
“There’s no such thing as a perfect home. My brother had an unlimited budget and built an 11,000-square-foot log cabin on a 120-acre mountaintop. When he was done he told me if he could start over, he’d change 100 things. No house is perfect, but we will find you the best one for your budget and for your wants and needs today.” “Let’s get you with one of my trusted lenders first thing. That way we’re not looking at homes you can’t afford and we’re not missing the homes you can.” “I agree the paint color here is awful, but understand, in every home, there are things easily changed and things that are not, such aslocation, floor plan and lot features. If it’s got the most important fundamentals, then lock it down and make it your dream home by getting those cosmetic changes done after closing.”
“I appreciate you want to think about it before making a decision. But I’d be remiss if I didn’t tell you that while you’re thinking about it, someone else who saw it before you has already thought about it and could buy it out from under you. So, if you decide you want it, please let me know immediately so we can pin it down.”
“On average, homes are selling for 98.5 percent of list price (real number), so to expect that you can get 10 percent or even 5 percent off any given property is unrealistic, though not impossible on a case-by-case basis. When you find one that suits you, we’ll evaluate and decide the best offer.” “Absolutely we can bring your parents to come see the home. But understand that they have not seen all you have seen. They are as likely as not to try to talk you out of the house. So, if you really love this house, just be prepared. It’s your decision.”
To Home Sellers
“Let me tell you the fundamental difference between a buyer and a seller. For a buyer, this is an emotional process, and rightfully so. This will be their sanctuary when they come home from a hectic day. They will make memories here for years to come. The home they buy will represent them to their family and friends who visit, so there’s a rightful ego element as well. As a seller, you need to be pragmatic. We need to prepare the house to emotionally appeal to prospective buyers.”
“In preparing your home for market, consider the buyers emotional reception. While their agent is opening the lock box, the buyer is standing on the porch looking around. If they see peeling paint and cobwebs, they get an “ick” feeling. I call that a rock in their backpack. Then they walk in the door and it’s a nice bright entry with a beautiful staircase and shimmering hardwood floors. They love that and feel good again. Then they turn the corner and see a couple foggy windows. Rock in the backpack. Maybe it’s a gloomy day and the living room and dining room are dark. Dark evokes uncertainty and even fear. Rock in the backpack. The primary bedroom is large and has a ceiling fan that clearly hasn’t been dusted in years. Dirt. Ick. Rock in the backpack. They may have seen many things they liked in the house but for some reason, as they’re leaving, they feel a heaviness that says this just isn’t the right house, not even realizing that it was just a bunch of little things that added enough weight to make the house not feel good to them.”
“I fully appreciate what you’d like to net on the sale of your home. And I can see how the five-car garage and the She Shed have been very valuable to you. I also understand that you spent $10,000 on that fabulous wet bar in the family room. If we could find a buyer that had exactly your taste and your needs, and they weren’t budget conscious, you can bet that they’d buy the house. But the average buyer will not have exactly your taste or your needs and they will be shopping for the best bang for their buck in a house that meets their needs. The hardest thing for a homeowner is to be objective and understand that yours is just one of the number of homes they have to choose from. Our value proposition has to be superior if we are to succeed in attracting the next viable buyer.”
“What should you do to prepare your home for the market? Do what I call the 3Ds, which are Declutter, Depersonalize, and Deep clean. If you only did that you’d be ahead of the game.”
“Should you paint? We have a saying: Paint is $25 in the bucket and $1,000 on the walls.”
“What else can you do? Grab a notepad and let’s walk around. I’ll tell you the ideal, but you don’t have to do everything I say— just everything you can as it will help us get a better price and a faster sale.”
And the one I most hate to have to say: “I see no indication that what you’re asking for is feasible. I would rather turn you down today than let you down in the months to come. If you find an agent that will list for what you want, just please remember me if the house doesn’t sell. I would love to come back and create with you a plan for success.”
Happy Homes from the “Home” Team!
